Tiring Dilemma

Oh I love buying things (like who doesn't) but the phase of BEFORE and AFTER buying the thing always always and always burdens me. I always have my sisters and parents in my mind before I buy something (like is it FAIR for me to buy this when my siblings don't? and my parents! they work so hard for me to buy... things?) and after buying it? THE WORST. I would contemplate for days especially when I feel unsatisfied with it (which happens like MOST OF THE TIME)

I don't have to bring old memories, it legit happened just now. 

Ok, previously I had Innisfree Jeju Volcanic Clay Mask on my buying list but because of the "BEFORE phase of buying things" I told you above, I decided I didn't wanna buy it.

but this annoying roommate of mine (not surprise) cunningly  persuaded me that I should treat myself sometimes (wth she's saying, I've always had good time spending money on fancy food when I go out kot??)

but being the forgetful me, I bought her words (oh my god I HAVE ONLY BOUGHT PERIPERA 2 DAYS AGO TOO WHY THE FRUIT I LISTENED TO HER *shoves knife to saza*)

so like people often do, I added the stuff into my cart and *kaching* paid for it! (haha I deadass woke up, signed up for hermo and straight away bought it sdfjkslds I swear my roommate's a witch!) and then after a few minutes bla bla, I got triggered- it's like my body alarmed all my cells to like 

"GATHER EVERYONE, TIME TO GET ANXIOUS!" all because I felt unsatisfied and yeah I could imagine all my cells running here and there, creating chaos. just like me.

so what I did was I opened lots of new tabs, just to see the review (again!), got assurance from my roommate (haha freak, again), told my concern in SFS (sound suuuuper annoying too, can't be helped), also to my sis (the most helpful) and lastly, kakti (who's next to my room). THAT'S 5 SOURCES AND BACK-UP IN TOTAL.

damn, I seriously need to be treated.