My loyal, lovely watch.

My loyal, lovely watch. It's nothing fancy, you can even see the rust from the picture. but it's exquisite!

I bought this watch at a very cheap price from our local kedai, our frequent clock shop since I was little, and I have bought at least 3 watches there as I grow up. We watch the seller grows old, basically. An honest chinese man, probably in his 50s now.

aaaand.. that is why this watch is special. It is the epitome of my personality! I can't lose it. I would never want to and I hope I don't. As an avid minimalist, I always feel that it's enough for me to own just one watch my entire life, as long as it works. however, I had previously owned 4-5 watches and you might want to wonder why and what happened to my minimalist idea. (as someone who claims herself as one. rolls eyes)

here is the answer.

I have many bad traits- one of them is forgetting where I place my things and stuff. like, I could be putting my precious purse on the seat next to me, initially just for three seconds and end up realising I do not have it in my bag after I went home. That's how it has always been with my stuff, be it the biggest thing like my phone!

and yes, there goes all my entire watches that I lost. one of them was left in RnR somewhere, another one lost in surau ipba... hahaha ha...

thus, my current watch. many times I had lost my hope over this watch because I always, always forget to pick it up after placing it somewhere.

but every single time it happens, this lovely watch always makes its way back to me! I have left it in so many places, you name it. in the toilet, in surau ipba (again, tapi tak hilang), rumah sedara, everywhere! but it always always makes its way home, wrapped around my wrist in the end!

I love it. I love her. This watch is one of the few things that always reminds me how bad that trait is, and what I do to improve. Therefore, I don't plan on losing it anytime soon. I hope I don't. 

Sneaking Out to a Concert a Day Before My Exam

this was my first concert. also the first event I went to without telling my m- wait. scratch that. this was, as far as I can remember, my first time not telling my mom any of my business, at all. well, whose mother would allow her daughter to go to a concert, a night before her exam? asian mothers could never, I thought.

therefore I just went through it without telling her, with a courtesy of slipping my exam notes in between my stuff in the bag hoping I would read them, lessening the guilt of not revising the subject the night I was supposed to.

god knows how much I contemplated to post this picture on instagram that day, a month after it had actually passed. being me, I HAD ALWAYS wanted to post something that makes me extra, extra happy. at that time, all I cared about was posting that picture. sure I was worried, bc my mom follows me on instagram!

but I did post it anyway. 

and like a girl who just confessed, I threw away my phone right after I clicked 'post' and I found myself trembling, hard. chances were my mom was definitely going to scroll through her feed and saw that! I wished the words of "my heart is thumping loudly against my chest" could make a real sound so everyone could hear how loud it was. I waited for some moments after that and there was no call. no message. nothing. so maybe.. maybe I am okay.

and like any other day, I casually called her to talk about my days and I ended up tripping myself over the guilt I had.. lmao I really have to break it to her myself in the end, because it felt wrong to me T^T and it went like:

"Have you seen my latest post?"

"Hm"

"Do you.. know.. when was it?"

"No"

*nervous sweating* "Um it was right before my literature exam Ma"

"Okay"

"Mak tak marah?"

"Dah lepas kan. Sapa lagi yg pi?"

and I told her everything, the ticketing, my view that day, how I performed my Maghrib (important), who were the artists etc.

after some days it struck me, maybe, maybe my mom was waiting for me to tell her myself. maybe all I needed to do was just- tell her, myself. and I wonder what did she feel when she saw the post, was it anger because I went to a concert? or disappointment bc she knew that through my instagram instead of my own mouth? ....tbh high chances are maybe mak tak rasa apa-apa pun and I am just being dramatic right now. Hahaha

from that day onwards, I decided, it doesn't matter if I want to tell her earlier or later, I would never let her find out my days from instagram anymore... I hope so.

and I figured, my mom and dad are actually so cool about everything, probably because I am no longer below 18 now, and most importantly, it's because I know they have given me their trust so I don't think I want to break that. ever.

all I need to do is just, tell them.

and therefore that wraps up my first concert experience with Hajar and Kak Maine, seeing Red Velvet and NCT! FOR FREE. ihiks